Tuesday, 26 April 2016

10 Things I've Learned As A New Daddy This Week (Part 11)

1. Mara is a very efficient wee girl, she likes to fill her nappy at the same time as she is being fed.

2. When a nappy leaks there are no winners. The stench from the one I was tasked with changing on Sunday is still lingering. I toyed with the idea of getting the Karcher pressure washer out of the shed purely to clean Mara on Sunday night. That one almost broke me!

3. If you manage to keep your house clean all the time, then you cannot fully appreciate that hour every other week when it actually is.

4. Parenthood is a fly bastard! Literally, the second you think you may have mastered a part of it, something changes and you're automatically shite at it again.

5. As far as aftershaves go I'm normally a John Varvatos kinda guy, but recently Mara has been insisting that I wear Eau de Spew. Apparently it's a new craze and all the new daddies are rocking it...
(The above image also applies to us dads!)

6. Me and Caz are making like Dusty Springfield and "Wishin' & Hopin'" that her new Sleepyhead bed will live up to the hype and give us some respite from the lack of sleep.

7. Our local council are forging ahead with their absurd plan to replace everyone's black rubbish bin with one half the current size. So I'm extending an apology to my neighbours just now in case they catch me being a nappy ninja in the middle of the night and hiding dirty diapers in their bin!!

8. Trying to clip and file a baby's nails so they stop clawing chunks out their face is like trying to clean the blades of a lawnmower while they're still turning. You will get injured.

9. Bath time is becoming something she likes now! Mara is starting to behave more like a little fish splashing about and trying to swim instead of feeling like she's whitewater rafting!
 


10. Mara had her first ever play date with little Joshua, her room mate from SCBU, on Saturday! They were so cute together lolling about on the floor and babbling away to each other before ultimately falling asleep! It's obviously exhausting being a baby, especially when you don't sleep at night!