1) "Oh, look at the size of that baby, she's too young to be out".
What? How the hell would you know how old she is just from looking at her? Yes she's small, due to her prematurity, but had you paid attention to how alert and inquisitive she is, or even bothered to ask, you would know that she's not too young. Belt up.
2) While standing in Next waiting to pay for items I was buying...
To Mara "Aw, look at you, you're gorgeous!"
To Me "Is this you just got her for the day?"
Erm... Wait a minute... How do I give off the vibe that I'm an absent father who only sees his kid for a few hours at the weekend? The ring on my finger kinda says otherwise. Maybe, in the era that we live in, myself and my married friends are the exception rather than the rule, we don't all sleep around and have umpteen different kids to different women in every town. We intend to be around for our wives and kids 24/7, not waiting on a bigger handout from the government because we've racked up child number 7 with the 5th wee dirty we've picked up in Club Earth.
3) In a lift in the centre... Mara has just woken up at this point and was a bit cranky because she was hungry...
Some 60+ year old guy "Aye, you better get her back to her mother, you've obviously not got the 'equipment' to deal with that."
Yes, you old goat, that's because I just like to carry around this baby bag full of nappies, bottles and pre-mixed milk for fun. I like the challenge of trying to navigate this god forsaken place with a baby and a buggy as well as a large bag full of essentials so that my wife can have a day off (although to be fair, poor Caz was in the showroom working!)
Why do perfect strangers think it's acceptable to make such comments?!
This is why those in my circle of friends wonder why I dislike people in general!
To end on a high though, we did have a quick, impromptu catch up with my old primary school friend Sara who I haven't seen in almost 20 years! Those of you who like art and fashion should go check out her work, she's a very successful fashion illustrator, artist and art blogger now based in Dubai, UAE. You can find her on Facebook under Sara Japanwalla - Fine Art and Illustration, or at www.sarajapanwalla.com